LAF Life (Living Alcohol Free)

Living at a Higher Vibration, Season 3 Ep. 3

• Tracey Djordjevic

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We definitely brought a higher vibration to this episode with lots of laughs and additional insights from our guest co-host Jamie Swaile. We all know alcohol works to lower inhabitations, but what you may not realize is that it comes at the cost of lowering your vibration. In this episode we define what living at a higher vibration means to us and how the decision to ditch alcohol naturally increased our vibration over time.
We also provide some tips on the small things you can start today to help increase your vibration. Experiment with a few of these ideas and see what you're naturally drawn to. Those are the things that always work best for us.

Catch our guest co-host Jamie's full story in Season 2, Ep. 4
https://laflife.buzzsprout.com/1903203/11509851
Follow Jamie on Insta @j_swaile

Helpful Resources:
19 Ways to Raise Your Vibration — Sustainable Bliss | Self-Care and Intentional Living (sustainableblissco.com)
How to Raise Your Vibration | Emotional & Spiritual (chopra.com)

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Connect with your podcasters. We'd love to hear from you!
Tracey: https://www.instagram.com/tnd1274/
Kelly: https://www.instagram.com/pamperedkel/
Lindsey: https://www.instagram.com/hariklindsey/

**Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this episode are not professional or medical opinions. If you are struggling with an addiction please contact a medical professional for help.

Music provided by Premium Beats: https://www.premiumbeat.com
Song: Rise and Thrive
Artist: Young Presidents

Resources:
Wellness Togethe...

Kelly:

welcome to the LAF life podcast, a lifestyle podcast based on living alcohol free and a booze soaked world. My name is Kelly Evans and together with my friends, Tracey Djordjevic, and Lindsay Harik. We share uncensored. Unscripted real conversations about what our lives have been like since we ditched alcohol and how we got here by sharing our individual stories. We'll show you that there isn't just one way to do this, no matter where you are on your journey from sober, curious to years in recovery and everyone in between, you are welcome here, no judgment and a ton of support. Hey everybody, welcome to the LAF Life podcast. This is season three, episode three. Tonight we're going to talk about living at a higher vibration and I'm here with the ladies and also guest host Jamie Swale. Hi everybody.

Jamie:

Hello.

Kelly:

Jamie told his story. On the Laugh Life podcast, season two, episode four, and we got some really good listener feedback. So we thought it would be a good topic to invite Jamie back to. I know for myself the way I describe things is really everything on the other side of alcohol for me has been brighter and it feels like I'm living at a higher vibration. What about you guys?

Tracey:

Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. You guys know I always say, people need to come to the bright side of life. But I would say that my life, for sure, everything started happening and falling in place for me as soon as I gave up alcohol. So definitely everything in my life was improving and I feel like energetically that's because I was letting out a higher vibration myself and sending out that higher frequency, which. Had a kind of snowball effect in my personal life and my career and everything just grew and got better and better from there.

Kelly:

Awesome. Love it.

Lindsey:

I feel like for me, it didn't happen right away. I feel like I'm still in the phase where things are now just getting really good. The key is I didn't give up on the idea or the dream that I had a better version of myself inside of me without the substance. Because like I said in previous episodes, I was like, I don't know how I can even do life without wine, or what am I going to look like feel like how am I going to socialize? How am I going to fill my time, but now that I've worked on myself. Without using alcohol, it's wow, this December is going to be four years for me. And now I feel like, okay, I'm awesome. I'm feeling really good. I'm making all these changes. So it's not something for me that I gave up alcohol and I was like, damn, life's good. I knew I needed to stick with it. And I knew I needed to stay on that path to get to this point where now I'm like, I don't think I can ever see myself consuming it again because it just doesn't fit anymore. And the version of me now is so different from before. People say to me, you're so different. You look so different. Your energy is different. And I'm like, yeah, it started four years ago when I cut out alcohol and it just snowballed.

Kelly:

Yeah. I love how you always say that as your first thing, you've made lots of changes, but that's always your first thing, yeah yeah, it is Jamie. What do you think? Because you just celebrated 12 years. 12 years, yeah. 12 years. That's a lot of years, man. That's awesome. Congrats. Yeah thank you. You're welcome. I'm just imagining what my energy vibration was growing up all the way till I got sober because I didn't have the high vibration energy. I wasn't joyful. I wasn't happy. I was fear, guilt, shame, all my life. I look back at certain parts and I did amazing things, but everything was hard. It didn't come to me like if I wanted to play for this football team, I would have to do this and that, but then it worked out, but it was hard. And that's all because of my energy. And it's not until let's say this present moment where I always say my life is easy because everything comes to me easily. I wouldn't be like this because alcohol for me would stop me growing from inside. If I kept on managing my drinking, I would never ever look at myself or any of my feelings because I would just have another beer the next day. I'm grateful for Being an alcoholic, I always say that. I love it. If that makes sense. Yeah, totally. Totally. Yeah, true. But yeah, if you look back at it we all relate, you know when you're in a good vibe moment and it doesn't matter what that feeling. I never had that. In my life before I stopped drinking ever.

Lindsey:

It was fake though. If I had that, I'm just exactly thinking like it wasn't even real.

Jamie:

No. So that, that, that's pretty cool.

Tracey:

Or it was really temporary, I feel yeah.

Kelly:

Yeah. Temporary. Yeah, looking back, I. Thought that I was living, I guess what we would call a higher vibration because I was doing that, work hard, play harder lifestyle, doing all the things, going all the places and all that stuff. But yeah, this side is just way more authentic. And not so much focused on what other people are doing. I was part of all these things and part of all these groups and social events and things like that. But I was not paying attention to what was going on the inside. Yeah. But from the outside that's why social media is so dangerous. It's yeah, all the pictures ooh, look, look at, I'm doing all these things. But yeah, not me. It wasn't me.

Lindsey:

I feel like because it's authentic, it's sustainable. There's no putting on appearances. There's no fakeness. And there are points in my life too, where I thought shit, I made it or I'm doing great. But I look at those pictures of myself and I'm like, Your eyes say a different story I can just see it and sometimes I'm not being judgy I feel like I can have empathy for people who are Posting things and I'm like, oh you want people to see how well off you are But I'm like something's off about the picture just with your energy or your eyes Yeah, and I don't know I used to be that Yeah, you're not being judgy because you used to be that. You're seeing that as like a reflection of who you used to be. Reminder. 100%.

Kelly:

Yeah. I like looking at my Facebook memories. Sometimes I like it. I like them as reminders, but yeah. Major cringe. Yeah, today I got one of sitting after a celebration of some sort and just puffy and ugh, drunk and thinking I was living the life. Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie:

We always thought we were so cool. We were super drunk, eh, What the fuck? Were we?

Lindsey:

I don't know, man. And, what about for you guys a lot of my friends circles have changed most of my friends circles have changed, and I think that's maybe a fear that keep people stuck, am I going to lose all my friends, because all my friends are drinkers, before they take that step. I know for me, I had that fear. And I used to say, I don't know anybody that doesn't drink., that's not true. But I didn't, I know on the other side of things, the right people start to pop up and the people that are more in alignment with who you are and where you are on your path and relationships. Do change. And the people that aren't meant to be in your life, they, move away and that's okay. I do think that's a big fear for a lot of people. It was for me.

Tracey:

I think you start noticing that you are on a different vibration than other people though. That are stuck in that cycle that you used to be in. So it's amazing to me how much less energy it takes. when you're sober to have that kind of higher energy. But I never feared losing friends because I think I have a pretty solid group of friends. I'm fortunate for that. And I have friends that don't drink. I have friends to that kind of have, been trying to cut back on their drinking as well. And of course, I still have friends that do drink but I've been able to maintain those friendships and also gain new friendships along the way and I think that I've been very lucky that I've had a lot of supportive people around me, regardless of what their drinking status is. And as you guys know my whole family went through their whole process of not drinking either so I was super fortunate to have that experience. But my family would have been supportive, regardless, because they always have been. But. Oh, we got another co host. Laughing Popping in. Anyways, yeah, so that wasn't a huge fear for me, but I can definitely understand why it would be for some people. Yeah, I was just gonna add I think for me hearing that, that is valid. I think speaking from personal experience, I did lose friends, but it didn't feel like a loss. Because those people were in my life for, drinking. We would get together and that's all we would do is, a person would bring over two or three bottles of wine because she knew we were going to go through one in the first hour and then what? And that's all we would do is sit at the kitchen island and drink. And be silly and laugh and then eat a bunch of bree crackers when you remove that substance and you decide to not have it in your life, some people are just not going to want to call you as often or they're not going to want to hang out. And because I'm working on myself, I was almost grateful for that. You realize, hey we didn't really have a connection other than sharing this toxic behavior that we do together. We would drink till we were blacked out at home. Then have a dance party in the living room. So I think, and you're right, as you're moving along and, developing yourself, you do meet different people along the way that are on that path. So as people leave. And not in any bad way, there was never any fallouts or anything, but I did find that I just didn't relate to some of the people that I had in my life. And that's okay. I think we're supposed to grow and change and as a result, different people come and go and that's okay. I never felt lonely. I never felt like I was missing out. And I was okay with the changes that were happening, and I think if you really have good people, good friends in your life, they're going to understand. They're going to want you to be healthy and your best version, so anybody that doesn't support that, you would have to analyze what the friendship is really all about.

Jamie:

Yeah, yeah, I made some notes about this episode and loneliness came up and there isn't really a lot of loneliness I found because as you grow and learn more about yourself, you become more comfortable with yourself. I went to a. Immediately. So I didn't feel lonely. I went to meetings every day and I had all the people's number. But as for friends, absolutely. I did. So consciously, if I'm changing identity, I don't need to be with I hung out with my friends because they drank like me. That's it. Just made up. And when we were drunk, we would just do stupid things. But when I stopped drinking, I hung out with the old guys everywhere at Salisbury. I needed company. That's who was upbringing me. And then even moving forward till today, this moment my friends have to improve my life, they have to impact me like that's why I want to hang out with if I talk like this to the guys I used to drink with 15 years ago, would have right over their head, right? So why would I this is the best thing I've learned. Come into your life. I don't know how he says it, but for a day or a year or three, but you appreciate that relationship. You know what I mean? Getting new friends that are going to make that journey a lot easier on the same path through sobriety is such a key thing. I think.

Kelly:

Yeah. Yeah. And having that common thread with people.

Jamie:

Yeah. Because you hang out with good people, especially at that time, AA was a lifesaver for me in the beginning just to feel like I wasn't alone that one hour and I'd go an hour earlier and there's always be a couple of guys in the back smoking cigarettes and those guys at that time, they were like, Oh thank you. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Tracey:

I think we naturally gravitate towards. Like people, so I think you naturally start to gravitate towards those people that are doing similar to you, or at the same vibration, speaking of that coming together with you guys. That was a huge support for me and having that connection and then since we've been doing the podcast, we've met so many amazing people and come to the realization that this community is so supportive. Absolutely not place where you'd ever feel alone. No. Yeah.

Jamie:

A little bit not off topic, but it's funny how, Kelly, you asked me to do this and I was going through my insides and I never think about my alcoholism, my AA, nothing I just don't drink, but I don't do any of that stuff that got me to that place. But in the beginning of sobriety, my first five, six, seven, eight years, I thought this was good. It wasn't until the last three or four years when I started. Everything else that happened, all the everything, the trauma, everything. And when you become aware of that. Then you put the two together and you're like, holy, the, not drinking was easy compared to this stuff. Right.

Kelly:

So Jamie, you're saying like the first five, six years of your sobriety, you didn't look at trauma.

Jamie:

I didn't know what trauma was. Okay. Okay. So like I was getting guided by people, and the thing for me, everyone is different. For me, I wasn't cutting back. I had to stop. I had no choice. Whatever they said in those meetings, I held on to cause I had no one. It was just like, just don't drink. So after a few years when I'm like, yeah, I don't drink, but inside I'm like, oh my God, it doesn't matter. And that's when I started Looking inside and that's got a whole new journey sure. 12 years sobriety of alcohol, but I'm like two years into another massive journey, so you just combine them. Yeah.

Tracey:

Do you feel like your vibration started to increase as you started to do the internal work. Then Jamie, I just thought, because if I stopped drinking, I can do everything myself because I don't want to do, I'm still like that. Don't get me wrong. But It's not true. Yeah. The insides. if I was like telling someone right now, who's I need help, what should I do? Depending on what level immediately I would make an appointment with the therapist or to take him in a room just so they can feel comfortable. But a therapist right from the start, I said that before is what I would do again, like right from the start.

Kelly:

Yeah. Start digging deep right at the beginning.

Jamie:

I was getting advice from anyone cause I didn't have anyone. And I didn't believe in myself. So if someone told me something that had more years, I would do it. I believe it. And I don't know why I was like, why I was doing everything it was hard but it goes back to the energy, even now today, I don't want to be around anyone, anything. My environment is always the best it could be because the energy has to be at that level every day. And it's very important.

Tracey:

I was doing some research for this episode to just I was interested. I know what living at a higher vibration means to me, but I was just in general thinking, what is the concept of living at a higher vibration, if you just Google, what does that mean. And you made me think of this, Jamie, speaking of your environment, because number one on one of the list was create a positive internal environment, including what you feed your body. But number two was create. Positive external environment, which is more what you were saying about how you surround yourself, Jamie. I know both you and Kelly have talked about your homes and certain things you do in your house. So another thing I saw in another list that I know both you guys do. So maybe you want to speak to this is plants. That is not something I do because I do not have a green thumb.

Kelly:

Neither do I. Jamie does. I look at this one. This one's good. But Jamie is good at plants. Yeah.

Lindsey:

That is a jungle. I love it. I am so energetically drawn to plants. It's not even funny. I have several in my home and I just, I don't know, I love them. They make me feel so happy, and they just change your space. You can think of your best.

Jamie:

Do you know why some of your plants will have like just one dead leaf? It turns yellow slowly. Why? Because plants absorbs negative energy. So I'll have a dead leaf once in a while. And that's absorbing the negative energy in my place. Because if a plant is growing, it's all healthy and one little branch is dying and a good friend of mine did that. Of course I Googled it. So it's true. But I believe that now.

Tracey:

That's awesome. So what do the plants signify for you guys, or what do they bring into your energy? Do you feel

Lindsey:

peace?

Kelly:

Peace. Harmony.

Jamie:

Yeah for me, because two years ago, I didn't even fucking like plants. Three years ago, I hated cats, and I hated fucking plants. Now I got

Kelly:

We just saw your cat. Yeah. I got a hundred plants. That's how much I changed, but it's just beautiful with green life growing. It is. Life, yeah. Life. Yeah. And they absorb things and they're growing, they are using the same water I'm drinking and air that I'm breathing. They're growing.

Tracey:

They say plants are oxygen, right? Yeah. Yeah. And this is a quote from Tony Robbins, but they say, like plants, if you're not growing, you're dying. Everything that is living, if it's not growing, it's dying.

Jamie:

They're growing. There's roadblocks of fear. You still want to do nothing. So you sit there.

Tracey:

We call that a rut, Jamie. And sometimes you gotta pick dead leaves off in order for it to grow more. I sent Jamie a picture of my half dead plants once and he said, are you talking to them? You have to talk to them. Help me.

Jamie:

I think Kel knows me the most, but I don't read instructions. I just get things. I figure it out, right? So one of my secret weapons is I talk to everything in my house. Plants and everything. And I do believe that. Same how I told you guys before when Grace was like conceived, I knew that talking to her she would understand it. Just like plants.

Tracey:

Speaking of environments, one thing that I did when I first stopped drinking was I built a gym in my basement. So for me, that was like my sanctuary. It was COVID, there was not much to do as it was. So for me, building the gym and then utilizing that as my positive outlet every day instead of alcohol. It really became my sanctuary. So when I built it, it was very clean, it was all white, very bright because it's in my basement and then I had a lot of motivational pictures and stuff on the wall, like quotes and sayings. And to me, that was the environment I built for myself to help me through my initial stages of giving up the alcohol.

Lindsey:

I like that.

Kelly:

And you were moving your body, which is Yes. Raises your vibration for sure.

Tracey:

Exactly. Another thing on this list was movement. Another thing, nature is, I know we talked about

Kelly:

I was gonna say that about the plants too. I love nature so much. I think that's why I just wanna have more nature in my house. That's why I want more plants.

Jamie:

More like life. Yeah. If I go look at a home, I'm not judging anyone, four years ago, I had a lever couch and a big TV that I used to watch football on. So I didn't even own plants. So what I want to describe you with how I used to live, but you can walk in at home with no plants. You just feel the energy. It just feels like I can't even tell it. If you walk into a home, you see a massive plant when you walk in immediately, uplift it. Yeah.

Lindsey:

It's so uplifting.

Tracey:

Yeah, that's true. I like to have fresh flowers. That's how I feel.

Kelly:

Probably like a similar feeling. Yeah. Yeah,

Tracey:

absolutely.

Jamie:

I always want to get fresh flowers, but I always forget to buy them. But yeah, beautiful bouquets.

Kelly:

Yeah, yeah. And opening windows, that's a big thing for me. It's hard for me to live here because there's lots of months out of the year that we can't open the windows. But yeah, incense I love, and essential oils and all that stuff. That changes the energy for sure.

Jamie:

You can do all that stuff. And that's what I have trust me, any way that I can get the highest, but If my thoughts aren't right, I can have 15 fucking incense going and Buddha everywhere, but if I'm in my destructive area, it doesn't matter. So

Lindsey:

how do you get out of that, though, that destruction? It everything sucks.

Jamie:

How do I get out of it? I had a few today. It's the same thoughts. They're not true, but it's like worst case scenario. And I caught myself and then what did I do? I moved, I cleaned. So I can't, I got to keep going, right? But then it's 6. 30, I'm like eight and I'm exhausted. I did two yoga today. I cleaned the place. It's not the most healthiest way, but I'm hoping soon I can be able to deal with it.

Tracey:

I think sometimes you do have to shake the energy out of you that's how I find what the gym when I exercise, there's been times in my life where I literally visualize myself on the treadmill just like pushing all the negative energy. Yeah.

Kelly:

So we had Eva on the last episode about the somatic awareness. So that is that somatic movement. I want to know more about this. And I know Jamie's on the path to learn more. Yeah, but you actually do shake like before my yoga practice, I shake my hands out. Like the helicopter arms that is proven ways to move energy out of your body. There's the tapping

Tracey:

was on this list. Aromatherapy was as well. Yeah.

Jamie:

All this stuff works, but why don't we do it? Why don't we do it? I think it's because I don't truly believe in it, but that's not true.

Kelly:

We're taught not to like, that's quackery or that's crazy, but this is stuff that has been around for thousands of years.

Jamie:

Exactly, yeah. Before doing it on YouTube, you're like, you see it, but then you're always like, ah, I don't, but it won't work.

Kelly:

I find that, once I do it and. Feel the effects of it. Then I know it's, this is something that works for me. I'm moving energy out of my body. I can feel it. I feel less anxious when I do this one thing. So I'm going to do this one thing. Yeah,

Lindsey:

It's our brain saying, Hey, if you do this different. thing. It requires a shift in habit and a little bit more energy that you have to put in to make it a habit. It's uncomfortable. We're programmed for comfort because uncomfortable is scary and it's not, we don't like that. Yeah.

Kelly:

Oh, and I don't look normal when I'm doing that. I do that in the yoga room. People must be like, what is she doing? But I don't care. Cause I don't care what it looks like. It feels good for me.

Lindsey:

Good.

Tracey:

It's crazy to think that we know scientifically everything has energy. So why aren't we believing that ourselves have energy and it has an impact on everything around us? What do you guys think of, cause this is something and I can't explain it. I know there's theories around it and people don't believe in it either, but I totally believe in salt lamps. Yeah, I have one. I have one right there. Look. It's on. Yeah. So I had one in my house and Mike gave it to me, actually. Huh. our old co host. I had it in my house and it's broken now, so I don't have it anymore. But I... Run a team at work of 16 people. So I got a lot of people coming in my office I say my office is like a doctor's office. I should just say doctors in some days. There's a lot of energy coming in and out of my office many days. So I actually got a salt lamp for my office because I just noticed when I had it, I, like I said, I don't have it at home anymore and I need to get a new one for home because I just noticed I feel a different energy when it's on. Yeah. I don't know how to explain it. It's supposed to get rid of negative energy. They say

Kelly:

it does. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I was at a some sort of like wellness expo or something trade show and they had a bunch of these salt lamps and they had big round ones that were a little bit domed, but you put them on the ground and you put your feet on them. They were amazing. Yeah. So I know we've talked about this on the podcast before about grounding and having your bare feet on the earth that is an instant. Switch in vibration, like you raise your vibration within seconds when you have your feet on the earth like that. Wow, that's raising your vibration and the documentary is called Earthing and it's on YouTube. We've put a link in another episode. But yeah, it's really good. Yeah.

Tracey:

I had listened to a podcast with, I think, probably the same guy. Prior to you talking about the documentary. So I had heard about it. I think I sent it to you, Kel, actually, when I listened to it. Anyways, but yeah, that is a fascinating concept too. But going back to energy, I like that we're touching on some things that I think are very simple things people can do if you want to higher your vibration or kind of kick like we were bugging. Jamie there. Kick the bad energy out or whatever, right? What do you do?

Kelly:

But maybe that's how Lynn said, why don't we do it? Is that you who said that? Maybe it's just so simple that people are like, no, that couldn't work. Taking my shoes off, like that's going to change things. Yes. Maybe it's just so simple that people don't think it's. Yeah. Yeah.

Lindsey:

Sometimes I'll have somebody over to my house and when they leave, I'm like, I'm lighting the sage. Yeah. You know what I mean? I don't know. I feel like that changes and shifts the energy.

Kelly:

It does. It definitely does.

Jamie:

Yeah. It totally does. Lindsay, you just have to pre qualify them before they come in your energy stack.

Kelly:

Exactly. Don't let them in. I'm out of that phase now, but man, before I was like, Oh, there is not enough stage. Yeah. If you buy anything you bring into your house, anything, if it's from Marketplace or Ikea, it's got energy attached to it. You got to stage that stuff. Always. I stage my Jeep like every three months underneath, make sure it's good. I don't know. I always google what to say, but I don't know. So I just say what I say, right? There's no one right way. And yeah, just, but then my friend who is really into the culture, you can't blow. I blow stage. You have to use a feather breath. It's not so or even if you do it even if you do it like this, like you don't have a feather. Yeah. And yeah. Crystals change energy

Lindsey:

to wear bracelets, with the different. Stones and I used to have an arm full of, yeah. Oh, that's beautiful. What is that? Amethyst?

Kelly:

Amethyst, rose squirts.

Jamie:

No, I dunno how to pronounce this one, but it was really got from Amethyst. No, I think so, but no. Yeah. It's, yeah. Love it. Again, I don't know if this all works. Proof, but I do know, how I feel. Yeah. So it really works for you. Yeah. And yeah. I'm very aware of when things just happen to me and whenever they happen, I always say thank you small things like gratitude again, but like

Tracey:

gratitudes on this list how you're you,

Kelly:

Smell and essential oil if you like it, get that one if you see a crystal that you're, drawn to get that one then it's probably in. Thank you. Alignment with your vibration. Yeah,

Tracey:

that's a really good point. Kel crystals come from the earth. They're so magical. I don't know everything about them. All I know is they're old. They're beautiful. They come from the earth. So they're powerful. Yeah. Might as well have some around your neck and all your house. It's funny what you guys were saying about the sage, because I have a bundle of sage here that I bought with the intention of everything that you guys are saying and I've never put it in a drawer. So I don't know, maybe it's replacing my salt lamp energy there, but I haven't burnt it yet. Oh, I love the

Lindsey:

smell. It's good. I know it's instantly calming for me. The second I smell it, I just, I feel like my whole body goes.

Kelly:

Yeah. Yeah.

Tracey:

Here's another supposed trick too, is have you guys heard this, but this is more for the absorption of stuff is onions. Onions apparently absorb. A whole bunch of different things. And it's not the first time I've heard it, but I was watching a girl was saying that she cuts an onion and leaves it out when her family's sick. So that the rest of her family doesn't get sick. And apparently it absorbs, the whatever bacteria in the air, the germs or whatever.

Kelly:

It's stink though.

Tracey:

She says your house will stink, but you won't get sick.

Lindsey:

That's it guys. I'm making you guys onion necklaces.

Kelly:

That's interesting. Yeah. I'm not surprised. I am not surprised. I believe that everything we need comes from earth. Yeah, everything we need to heal and all of that. Yeah.

Lindsey:

What about like drinking teas and herbal? I know that changes my vibration, drinking tea. That's very grounding for me. Yeah, camomile for sure. It's proven to help calm you and help with anxiety. I truly do feel better when I drink it. Peppermint, peppermint for me is big, just the scent of it. Has a calming effect.

Kelly:

Jamie's cat wants to be on camera. One of the best things when I go to festivals and I go to raves and the DJs when they have all the speakers on the ground and it is loud, like the dirt is vibrating for four days and having that energy is. I experienced that so many times in the past couple of years at these festivals and every time I do it, I focus my energy, just feeling out from mother earth. It's. Amazing. So yeah, music. That's true. That's a good one, too. You can turn a song on right now and your vibration, right? Oh, that's such a good point.

Jamie:

There's some songs I can't listen to because I go right back to where I was that memory and I can't. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And there are some songs that I listened to and I'm like, Most about mine and Grace's but where you were in that time, right? Music for me is my journal. It is. I can go through a music from three years ago where I know exactly what I was doing that time frame. When I was hyperfishing.

Tracey:

Yeah, it's really nostalgic for me too, Jamie. I can relate to that.

Jamie:

So powerful. I'm so happy that grace, my daughter I introduced her to music because if I want to listen to music, I'm all fuck. She's going to listen to music too. My music, my kids music. So after 10 years and now that she sends me songs back and forth and she was like, remember this song dad from the boat. And so she has it. So it's fucking, it's awesome. Yeah. That raised my vibration pretty high. Yeah,

Tracey:

scents too. Scents are very nostalgic for me as well. I love this conversation because you guys are touching on the majority of the stuff that was on this list. So it's interesting.

Jamie:

Not our my first rodeo. Yeah. It's like every day of my life. I'm just... This is, I have this done by the morning if I need help.

Tracey:

I think we should talk about it in reverse

Lindsey:

Oh, how do you mean? As far as how, when you are drinking, how does that impact your energy? If you think about it from a drinking standpoint,

Kelly:

yeah, just low, if I think about what my energy was like, just low just barely getting by some days, We're going like you'd say, Trace day, going through the motions, ground hog day yeah. Yeah, trying to fix my hangover. And then just waiting for the right time to have the next drink. What a boring fucking life. Like seriously,

Jamie:

we had excitement to knowing we're going to drink. So for me, it was excitement. Then it was after the first two drinks, then it was just despair, shame, guilt. Yeah. I had excitement.

Kelly:

Is that original? Is it the original? Is it dopamine that we get from like that?

Jamie:

When you feel like shit and you're like, Oh my God, I drank last night. I'm like, I need to get rid of these feelings to drink again. Yeah. Yeah. For about five, 10 minutes. And you're right. It's a dopamine rush, but it was also more to calm everything down. Yeah. It's the relief. Yeah. Later it was overwhelming of guilt, shame, and all that stuff. Sometimes I wonder I drank heavily from age 20. Yeah. Let's say from the first time I drank. And most of the time I have terrible guilt, shame, all that. So I think right now, today, how much am I releasing? The guilt and shame, how much is left in me, I don't know. And there must be so much because I felt like that every day for 20 years of drinking.

Lindsey:

Just think about that. Think about how long you drank heavily for that's how many years of suppressed energy and emotion and just, killing your vibe. You're literally killing yourself. It's going to take time to Have all of that come out. Kel, remember when I was like, I just can't stop uncontrollably crying.

Kelly:

Yeah, you were having like I messaged you all the time. I'm like, keep crying. Let it out. Let it out. But we're taught, but we are taught that crying is bad. What do we say when we start crying? Oh sorry. Don't be sorry. Let that shit go.

Lindsey:

Changes your energy because every time after a good cry, I feel amazing

Kelly:

think of how well you sleep when you go through something and then you sleep after that.

Jamie:

I did hear something, but I don't have proof on it that a good cry is like one of the best ways to release energy because you're building up the tears. It's all the emotions. Oh yeah, I believe it. Again, don't quote me on this, but it's one of the best ones. So

Lindsey:

we've actually analyzed tears too, happy tears, sad tears, different pheromones and hormones come out in your tears. It's crazy. And I think having a good cry and not being afraid to release it, whether you do it privately you don't have to cry in front of people, but yeah, I just think that's such a powerful way to change your state. I do and that comes out in Reiki when I have Reiki clients I always say there's Kleenex here and then there's Kleenex over there if you start crying do not stop it just let it go I'll pass you a Kleenex like just yeah.

Jamie:

Just think how much the body has to do to produce that seriously, we don't think about that. It's not just tears. Imagine everything is moving and shaking to feel those emotions, to produce tears and unstoppable crying that you can't control. That is probably releasing a lot of. Yeah. I got to start crying more because I don't know. I think I have a heart attack.

Lindsey:

I love a good cry. And you know what? I haven't had one in a long time. I feel like I went through a phase like very recently, last year where I was crying a lot. And Kelly, I would be like. Be reaching out to you about it, and you're just like, you're on a breakthrough.

Kelly:

That's good. It's good. We've been taught that it's not good and we're not supposed to do it, but I think the complete opposite. I think your body is releasing something that it needs to release and it's healing.

Jamie:

And even happy tears or tears when you listen to a song, it doesn't always have to be sad. Crying is.

Kelly:

I love crying. You should have a crying podcast next week. I know, but you know what? I am pretty, emotional and I'm not afraid to show my emotion, but I see it as like a celebration because I went so many years with not. anything. I only wanted to feel happy anything other than happiness, I shoved down with alcohol. So my tears are a celebration of my ability to feel my emotions. Yeah. Oh, golly.

Tracey:

Yeah. And I think that when you don't release tears, that you're just repressing other things. I can't imagine it's just another form of holding stuff in. True. How many times? For me, I speak, but when I drank, the only time that I ever cried was when I was blackout and over with sad and the tears would come out just like incredible. But I never had anyone listen because fuck it's one in the morning, one in the afternoon. I don't like that I'm drinking, when I look back at those times what, like how the what was I thinking? I can't imagine now about myself and how the brain works and emotions and all these things. I don't know how I survived when I got sober, with no head. I was like a four year old in a 33 year old body. He will be married with a baby coming in two, three years. Yeah, we were talking about that on the last episode, too. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I was saying that I feel like people that have had a lot of childhood trauma, they never really emotionally mature if they're not doing work on themselves, obviously, out of that kind of emotion of whatever, eight year old, 10 year old, their emotional maturity never really reaches, a normal mature level, if they're not doing the work on themselves. Yeah. Yeah. I tell grace my daughter, the same thing the best awareness I have through all this is when people, just because someone is in a body of a 45 year old or a 50 year old, they're not that they're not 30 years old. Emotionally. Usually there's a little boy in him. And as a young girl in her, both these little. They want approval, but coming out of an older body. So if you just focus on the inner, and you understand that it just makes. Everything's so much more easier to absorb. If someone's mad or not, but because it's true, it's 100 percent true. You got to think about the place it's coming from, because it's coming from what did.

Jamie:

Have you had a conversation with someone in your age bracket that you just couldn't get across it was talking to a 12 year old boy or like an 18 year old girl. Awareness is so healthy,

Tracey:

but it's coming from a place of pain. That's what I was going to say. That's what Eva was saying too, right?

Jamie:

Yeah, of course. You'd get rejected for something, you're not like, oh, that's fine. No, it still hurts. I got rejected. It's still terrible, right? So absolutely. That goes to carrying that trauma in your body. Yeah. If I see people argue outside in public, I can tell within a second, if he just said one thing and she said one thing, both the little inner child would have that attention. That reinsurance that Hey, I do love you. I'm mad at you now, but I do love, okay, great. Instead of fighting the inner child.

Tracey:

Speaking of emotions, the other thing that was on this list is laughter. Laughter. Laughter. And laughter for sure is an amazing energy and to me laughter is contagious. You get me laughing in a way. It's going to take you a good 20 minutes if you're lucky to get me to stop. Some people probably regret starting me on something. That to me is, yeah, very energetically fulfilling. Yeah.

Jamie:

When someone's funny, it's funny. Yeah. Yeah. You want to be around more of that, right? Yeah. But sometimes you don't even know them. You just hear them and you're like, what are you talking about? Just, your voice is so funny. And then you just laugh. That's, those are the best laughs.

Lindsey:

Yeah. The best. Yeah. It changes too. Your inside, like the chemical stuff happens when you laugh.

Jamie:

It goes back to the beginning of the show about people and friends. For me, if I had the same friends I've had for. Years, I wouldn't find them funny because I know them. So it's nice to get new friends and experience true laughter or whatever. It's having the same people. Maybe that's a me problem.

Tracey:

They just tell their same bad jokes over and over. They just need to get new jokes. And you'll be fine, but it's amazing to how there's some people you just instantly can feel their energy as soon as they enter a room or, yeah, yeah, it's very powerful. So I think that it's definitely to your advantage, if you can increase your vibration and. Stop drinking is a really good number one step in order to do

Kelly:

yeah. Yeah. Almost every single thing we talked about on here today to see. It's like a simple thing that you could do yourself, it's not a big, huge, massive change, but add one or two things in or one thing a week or something, yeah. And I think that if you are drinking Unfortunately, that's suppressing a lot of those things that we're creating to increase our energy or our vibration like if you think going back to creating a positive internal environment. If you're drinking, you're filling your body with poison to start, so you're probably not really starting with a good internal environment, let alone what your external environment is, because then you're also surrounding yourself with those like people, those like vibrations I don't think, it's really possible to increase your vibration very much while you're drinking. From my experience it didn't go so well for me. Even trying to eat healthy and take supplements and better my health that way, I was like, Okay, I'm still going to drink wine, but I'm going to take greens. And I'm going to take magnesium. And I'm going to take this supplement. That was neat, too. What's the point? You're like reversing it all at the end of the day. I know. I think that lowered my vibration in a way because I knew intuitively what I was doing to myself. I knew that I wanted to be the type of person that Drank the green smoothie and went to the gym. I did do those things, but then at the end of the day, I ate the wheel of Brie and drank the bottle and a half of wine. So I knew that I wasn't being good to myself. I was only who I wanted to be at the beginning of the day. And then the end of the day, I shit all over it.

Lindsey:

Yeah. You're treating your body like a trash can. You're literally treating your body, the thing that you get one of for your entire life. You get one. You don't get any refunds or exchanges. You get one and you're literally treating it like a garbage can. It's crazy what we do. And here's the thing. Here's the good news. The body is so smart and so regenerative and repairs itself. When you cut your finger, you can literally be gushing blood. And in a week that thing is closed up and your body literally made brand new cells. To heal it so I think if we have some listeners that are like, Oh man, I drink all the time and there's no hope for me. Yes, there is.

Kelly:

You can heal yourself. You can heal yourself. Yes. Yes. The second you stop putting that in your body and just stay consistent. You don't have to add all these things. Just pick something and stick with it. Give not drinking the same chances that you've given drinking. And Tracey said at the beginning there, was just one little word and we didn't really get into this part of it, but the food that you put in your body, like that, living at a higher vibration, check out the food that you're putting into your body.

Jamie:

You have to depending, when you say drinking, I'm always like, if somebody wants to stop drinking and they're still drinking, they're still managing it. I'm just using my own experience, fuck. I wouldn't be able to think if I want a cucumber the next day I'm just worried about not drinking. So I guess it's different, but, and only for me, but every time I drank, I never had inspiring thoughts or like positive. It just stopped all the negativity stress. And then I sat there and if I kept on drinking, I wouldn't remember what I thought about, but that time I, so I don't know if it'd be easy for me to make massive changes the next day, but not drinking. Do you know what I mean?

Lindsey:

I don't think it is. I think then the thing to do is to focus on the I'm not drinking today. And then tomorrow, I'm not drinking today. And then the next day, I'm not going to drink today. If that's all you can do in the beginning, before you start adding something, That's what you need to do.

Kelly:

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Like you guys both just said, Linz, I've seen the change in you and Trace, you said that the other day too, you're saying, now you're really feeling it like almost four years later. And Jamie, you said after five years of not drinking, that's when you start to do the deep work. So I don't think any of us are saying, do this thing and you'll be like high vibe living, no, it's not that easy. But it is in your stepping control. This stuff is one decision at a time. And it can be one small decision at a time that can change everything. The first decision is to not drink.

Jamie:

If I told my younger self have to get ready to go deeper than you've ever. And you might lose family members. Your life is going to change and it's going to be hard. But the outside of it is beautiful. For the first seven years, not five, I exaggerate the first eight years, I just didn't drink. And I thought I was holier than water without doing any work. So that's what happened. What happened was, I just got fucking tired. In my head. I'm like, why am I doing this? Why am I doing that? I just outgrew things. And then what happened was when I started looking on Instagram with all this stuff and my feed nonstop with knowledge, that's amazing. And more awareness. Then now I'm just like, fuck, it's a lot. That's good though. Because I think when you're ready for the next thing even if it takes years, I feel like. The universe, God, whatever you call it, is going to present that to you at the time when you're ready,

Kelly:

when you're ready. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. I think also, too, what's been coming to me I told Kelly, I'm going to iowaska in Peru in a week and a half, so I'm really prepping myself for my attentions. And one thing is to forgive myself, like from all those times drinking and driving, getting in fights, stealing money. That's hard. It getting sick, every single day of the guilt and shame is one thing that I need to release and forgive myself. I think when I forgive myself, I'll have more confidence in myself.

Lindsey:

Think about it as you being the child version of you and looking at yourself, the child version has done those things. You have to come at it from compassion and empathy. Yeah, To forgive yourself. That's the hardest part. I think it's big. Yeah, you're right.

Jamie:

And we forget about it. Like it's big. It's really

Lindsey:

well, you spend so much time stuffing it down. Right? Just thinking one day when you were younger, if you did three things, there was a little emotions, right? Oh, I don't feel good about that. Time's up a billion and now you're 50. So to forgive myself now. I can't just, I've been trying to, but I have to go deeper. Hence why I'm going a little.

Kelly:

Yeah. So plant medicine, Jamie, that's part of your living at a higher vibration.

Jamie:

Oh, absolutely. Mushrooms absolutely have made me all these insights. I'm telling you is from mushrooms. So when people drink alcohol, it opens up a part of your brain that is like dark anger, jealousy, blah, blah, blah. And then when you stop drinking, it closes, but you don't remember it. Mushrooms. When you do mushrooms, it opens up another part of your brain that is love, compassionate, gratitude. The earth is breeding, there's no issues, right? But when that comes down, you're off the mushrooms. You still remember those feelings. So the more days with you, more mushrooms you do, the more time you open it. When I say mushrooms, micro dose, and you start to appreciate how small we are. It's just completely,

Kelly:

it's like a little rewiring of your brain I find. And then it does stay. Yeah.

Jamie:

When you drink alcohol, what does that do? That just makes this anger part when you do mushroom food, medicine. So you don't want the alcohol brain because it's full of anger and bad decisions. Yeah. Compared to mushrooms or other psychedelics.

Kelly:

I'm excited to hear about your iowaska journey. That's this month coming up. Yeah. That's I leave next week, but I got booked my flight. I thought it was like five hours away. It's it's a little further than that.

Lindsey:

It's I'm going to drive there.

Jamie:

It's going to force me to sit, which I have a hard time for 15, 20 hours and with a pen and paper. Yeah, hopefully I can put pen to paper, you know

Kelly:

yeah, that's awesome. Good for you for taking that journey.

Tracey:

I think that self forgiveness is the hardest part, Jamie.

Jamie:

Yeah.

Kelly:

No, but teenagers wandering around a little

Lindsey:

sneakers in the back,

Tracey:

Jamie's got cats. I got teenagers.

Jamie:

I guess I just don't. Understand how much of something that we have inside us that is really affecting us. Is it not forgiving us for those and pretending is that affecting other parts of my life that my subconscious is guiding me through daily. Also forgiveness is I think what I have to do when I'm there.

Lindsey:

I love that self realization that you had about forgiveness. That's what I know what you have to do.

Jamie:

Linz, I'm the only one that knows what I talk about in my head for the past 45 years trust me, I fucking need a lot. A lot of forgiveness, right?

Lindsey:

Through each of us and start with Jamie. What would your adult self, the version of you now, tell your child self? about alcohol or about consuming it? I had the beauty of having a daughter when I was three years. So she's my inner child. So I've been talking to her about alcohol from, whenever she asked and to now she knows my sobriety date and. Every year she, this year she texts me something was like super proud of you dad. That's the best thing. Everything I do is for her as when I was her age, but I'm neglecting my true inner child by giving you some sacrificing myself because I don't want to deal with little Jamie, but I'll give grace the best version of herself. What would you

Kelly:

tell them? They give little Jamie some grace.

Lindsey:

What would you tell him if you could? It's so easy to say that, but fuck, that's where I'm saying, how deep is it? I can't just be like, hey, little Jamie, you're coolEveryone likes ya let's go! What You know, the best thing about my whole life. Is I had a chance not knowingly to raise a daughter after three years of sobriety was the understanding on how core beliefs, how her environment, how her words, everything is creating her in her first seven years. I knew about that. And that's my secret. I did everything every day. I still do today. Encourage her, love her, make her feel safe. And she's 10 now and she's a fucking rock star. Ah, I love it. Yeah. Jamie could have used that. Hey,

Jamie:

If I never was an alcoholic, I would not have that, yeah. So true. People that are like, oh my god, I can't, imagine not drinking with this. I get it, but fuck, years later, you don't even think about it. It's beautiful.

Lindsey:

I would just be like, man, you better be careful with that. It is not. It's not everything it's cracked up to be, it is toxic poison and you're going to fuck your life up if you start drinking that.

Jamie:

I told Grace cause I had the benefit that Grace's mom and her partner, they still drink. So she sees that environment too. And I always tell Grace, I'm like, Grace, you can do what the fuck you want. I'm like, if you want to drink, you want to drink great. I'm not going to tell you, but I'm going to lead by example. I'm like, Grace, I drank because I didn't like myself. I'm like herself and she's I love myself. I'm like, yeah, that was my job as a dad, grace. Yeah. Love yourself so much that you don't need any substance or any other human being to make you feel happy. Oh,

Kelly:

that's what I would tell. That's what I would tell my younger self. That exactly. Yeah. If you do not need it to love yourself or be yourself.

Jamie:

Yes, I knew that from the start. And she might, and I always said to her, my grace, I'm always going to fucking love you. I might be disappointed, but I'm going to love you, but she'll make the right choices for her. But I did my part. So I feel good as a dad now knowing and I continue, if I go out with a. A work thing. I'm always like, fuck Grace, everyone gets drunk, they got bad fucking breath, they talk to me. She's like, how is that? It's not my vibe. So yeah.

Kelly:

What would you say, Trace?

Tracey:

That's a tough one. I would probably say, that you're enough as you are, and you'll come out of your shell when you're ready, and your light will shine when it's your time. Without it. That's good. Yeah, that is good. That's gold.

Lindsey:

Yeah, deal with it now or deal with it later.

Kelly:

Yeah, it's not all it's cracked up to be. That's what I said. I never told my kids not to drink or anything, but if they tell me a story about alcohol or something made them feel like shit or whatever, I'm like, yeah, alcohol's not that great.

Jamie:

a little off topic, but last week I went to a place in Osborne on a Friday night. First time in a long time, maybe 20 years for me to be on Osborne on a Friday night and I just stood out there and I people watched like it was scary. It just opened my eyes and it wasn't the young people. It's the older people that get super fucking drunk at night. Like the younger people, they look normal, right? It's like the mid 30s, mid 40s guys coming in with their buddies, they were just a mess. Wow.

Kelly:

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think less, we talked about that a lot on here, less of the younger generation is drinking the way that we all did.

Jamie:

But seeing some of them, how I feel is I would hate to be him because I know what's coming tomorrow.

Kelly:

I know. I always think that too. If I see drunk people, I'm like, Oh, she's going to feel like shit tomorrow. I don't see his wife. So she's probably going to ride him tomorrow. Yeah. I don't miss it. That's for sure. Not a single day. Have I regretted not drinking?

Tracey:

I'd say too that one of the biggest motivations for me not to drink is the fact that I know and I'm aware of how much higher of a vibration I am living on. Yeah, I wouldn't want to go back to that frequency. No.

Kelly:

And I'm sure you guys can all agree on the comments that people make when they see you, like you have changed it's your energy. Yeah, that it's your eyes and your skin and your energy.

Jamie:

First thing is your eyes. You can tell they're not, the white isn't. The eyes. Oh, dead eyes. It's just dead sad I need help. It's just desperate. I don't know. It's not a good look. No.

Tracey:

And the puffiness. The puffiness. Oh yeah, I noticed that. Yeah.

Kelly:

Oh, it was so puffy. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Yeah. I'll show you guys that picture later. Oh, yeah. It's embarrassing.

Jamie:

But she, you, I have one picture of me, but I got sick every day for two years, so I had Oh, my, my God was busted. Like little veins. Oh, your blood vessels? Yeah. Yeah. My face was round. I was like two 80 pounds. Ugh. It was a mess. And then I stopped drinking, so it's all weird. I guess we got to wrap things up that went by so fast. Yeah. Yeah. Anything else anybody want to say about living at a higher vibration? It's worth it. That's what I want to say.

Lindsey:

You deserve it. You deserve it. And you are worthy of it.

Jamie:

That was good, Linds. I think.

Kelly:

You feel motivated? That was for you. Talking to you. Thanks, you guys. That was an amazing episode. We covered a lot about living at a higher vibration. Again, if you want to hear Jamie's full story, that was back in season two, episode four. Thank you so much, Jamie, for coming on and being our first guest co host. You did a great job. Yes. Thank you, Jamie.

Jamie:

I'd love to have back in time.

Lindsey:

Love it. Thanks, everybody, for tuning in and joining us again. And don't forget, every Tuesday, new episodes drop. So make sure you subscribe to our show so you don't miss them. You can find us at our new website, lastlifepodcast. com. You can get guest episodes, you can find out more information about us, your hosts. And different resources and books to read, lots of good info on there. So thanks again, everybody for tuning in. Thank you to our guests today. And until next time, guys, you know what to do. Keep laughing.

Kelly:

Thank you for listening. Please give us a five star rating like and subscribe, share on social media and tell your friends. We love getting your feedback and ideas of what you'd like to hear on upcoming episodes of the laugh life podcast. If you yourself are living alcohol free and want to share your story here, please reach out.

People on this episode

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Kelly Evans

Host
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Lindsey Harik

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Mike Sutton

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Tracey Djordjevic

Host